Believe, breathe, do the work

This week I'm in a state of limbo.  After the excitement of having my full novel manuscript called in just two days after submission, I'm still waiting for a response from the agent.

It would be easy to get myself into a heightened state of tension while I wait for her to contact me, but I'm determined not to do that.  I'm old enough to know that if this agent doesn't work out for me then there are others who might.  

The challenge at this time is to continue to believe in my work and my vision.  And this could become an even bigger challenge if this agent ultimately doesn't take me on.  But strangely, I feel very calm about the whole matter.  I've sent the manuscript off, and the matter is out of my hands.  I can't affect the outcome, so the best thing to do is detach from it and carry on with my life.

What's needed is to take a deep berth and try not to fret about the lack of response.  I need to go about my ordinary business as if nothing unusual is happening.  And for me, my ordinary business means working on my writing every day.  It means submitting short stories to magazines, and working on the next novel.

I've decided to hedge my bets on this.  If Combined Cognition doesn't find an agent and publisher this time round then I'll move on to submitting the novel I'm currently editing, Starfire.  This is a novel I completed the first draft of a few years ago and never sent anywhere.  It is inspired by Elizabeth Moon's Vatta' War books and CJ Cherryh's Chanur series.  I thought it was too derivative of those other writers' work, but now I realise that was my internal censor speaking.

I needed to regain my belief in my work, step back and see how the novel is unique.  And it is unique.  Unlike the heroine of Vatta's War, my lead Ria is a trading captain who remains a civilian.  She operates a little like Pyanfar Chanur.  But she also works with an alien military commander to find her cousin.  And it's that twist that makes the book unique and worth working on.

So I'm  keeping my head down and working hard while I wait for the verdict on Combined Cognition. Believe, breathe, and continue to do the work is the mantra.  That's the only recipe that works for me at this time.