A messy ending

I'm rewriting a novel which I submitted to Gollancz for their open door a few years ago.  I got told that the novel had an intriguing concept, but that it felt unfinished.

Going back to the manuscript now, I completely agree that the ending doesn't work. Not because I haven't written one, but more because I've got the sequence of events leading up to the end in the wrong order.

The big reveal is finding out what's at the heart of the bioships.  My main characters set out on a continent-spanning quest to find that out.  It should be a shocking reveal - except that it's not.  And one of the reasons for that is because it happens about ten chapters from the end.  This is a common problem of mine, getting the Suoreme Ordeal in the wrong place.

After the reveal, I get one of my characters kidnapped - for the second time - which competely diverts the reader's attention from what are supposed to be shocking events.  And the last two chapters are nothing more than waffle.

It's a completely messy ending, and the way I structured it totally negates the impact of the message in the book.  The theme is man's inhumanity to other creatures, and the evil of exploiting other species for human gain, but that's completely lost in this version.  Another problem with my reveal is that there's not enough sense of threat.  Big, powerful aliens are present when they learn that humans have   taken their young.  My humans need to feel fear, and think that the aliens will kill them.  But I haven't got any of that fear in my human characters' minds.

So a total re-vamp of this messy ending is needed.  First will come one character's kidnap, by a bunch of renegade humans.  Later, that character's sister will be kidnapped - by aliens.  And this will be in revenge for humans taking their cubs, a much more sinister scene than I have now.  Last will come the grand reveal of the identity of the bioship's mind. That's a much more logical series of events.

I originally altered the book to make it into a trilogy, but it didn't work.  I've since started mapping out a second book which doesn't require the ending I originally had.  In my notes now the big reveal drives the action in the second book,  as it should.

Now all I have to do is shuffle these chapters about, which is proving mighty confusing.  But I'll be a lot happier with the story when it's done.